You may think I was lost at sea, a stranger unto himself searching for any path I could take that would fill the wounds. You may think I was raised in the best of homes, taught the best education with a goal to be the gentleman whom you could place your trust. You may even think I was the guy who was loved for my quirks, and my witty charm opened just enough doors to have the doors that I thought that mattered slammed in my face. The truth is that I am all of those with a lot of gaps in between, and certainly nothing without grace that fell upon me when I gave up.
People often say truth is relative these days. I understand your feeling of safety. Is it? Is truth relative when day after day we see mass shootings for senseless reasons.
I once valued all doctrine, truths and the need to be just to one another’s truths. The truth that matters is the truth that allows you to sleep at night, but don’t get that wrong. The relative truth is the reason you cannot sleep at night, the relative truth is created by the father of lies. Relative truth is not making it for you if you still wander into the kitchen and add a mixer to that truth in order to be brave enough to lay down for the night.
The truth that is found in Jesus has people reaching when the answers are given, it gives, and gave me the knowledge to add wisdom and step into a place where I won’t accept foolishness from myself and as well when I do something foolish I have the instructions and the grace to know that while I am not no longer a slave to sin. Relative truth tells you that no matter what you seek your answer will come. Does a map lead you to the same destination no matter the route you take? Truth in faith does not give me license to feel my grace is filled to the brim if I remain a person who says one thing and does another. Frankly, as many people today I deal daily with how people perceive me, it is a growing edge. However, when I know God is the author of my days and eternity it can and does give me knowledge and wisdom to be thankful that he cares enough to send Jesus to fight my battles.
I have been chained around my neck before. I literally have been in Christ and known I was in a place that if I didn’t respond to his mercy then I could extend the time of feeling hopeless to an uncertain moment, maybe the next time when I am somewhere I shouldn’t be and talents extended to me have been wasted, not used. We are not the author of days and when those days will end. That is truth, I cannot gloss that over, no matter how hard I might try. If it is comfort you’d like, try Psalm 139. It will hopefully never fail.
Hopelessness for any reason is not a battle you want, no matter the reason. A perfect storm, a battle you need to fight for when personal responsibility feels like it isn’t enough. We can lay blame, we can accept blame but the truth is the reason that you’re weak is twofold: it is because you can learn to place your hope in a God who doesn’t care who you are or your circumstances, he is going to give you the tools to fight.
People mess this up. Weakness is your strength. When you lay down for arms, and say: “you know what God, I am going to let you sort this out, because you are God, and I am not.” It sounds quaint, and I love that it is. It is child’s play, and it is meant to be. That is truth.
I know when we look at some of the most ridiculous situations on this planet like in the far east when children are tied and or chained to a wall so the worst of the worst can pay to abuse them. I don’t have an answer why some suffer to this end, and others do not. Is it that we don’t give enough in our churches to help orphans and others? I don’t give enough for my liking. Missionaries often return because the battle cannot be won with money alone, whether there is enough or not. People fail sometimes. We have to be in understanding of that truth.
Governments and principalities are fighting to keep themselves in a place of safety in their armaments and hold others in their place. We are only some of those fighting. Before you lay your head down tonight, please be thankful of what you have and think of what you could do if you had the chance.
We are however in a place to help. I believe if we had more people doing two things: loving God, and loving people this world would improve in such an amazing way and prayers of those who suffer would be answered. I promise you, they pray. When you do not have anything, the first thing you turn to is prayer. That is truth.
As amazing as it would be if we turned to prayer when things were good, and loved God and loved people when it wasn’t a last resort we just don’t do that very often.
Don’t settle. Don’t be the person you accept, be the person that is whether you want to admit or not is actually harder work. It is hard to be the person you want to be. Yes, I know you’re expecting me to say be like Jesus. Actually, I’m encouraging you to be the person you want to be. Not the thinner one, not the wealthy one, not the one with lots of likes and great vacation photos, but the person that when you put your head on the pillow, you are not regretting your thought, words and actions. I have been that person. It isn’t fun, cute or something your spouse or friends truly enjoy if they were a little more honest.
Call it self-righteousness if you’d like in order to feel better, or even judging to blow this off as another hypercritical antiseptic about whom you may joke. The simple truth is, I most likely don’t know you if you are reading this, you are not someone I eat and spend my days with. I’m the guy, who has got to be better, who has to be accountable to those that love him after myself and first to the one who died for me. That is truth.
While we understand a person’s personal story is not to be assumed or judged and the sum total of their pain cannot be measured or judged by outdated and outside means. As well we cannot be formed by our past, as much as we may regret it, we are creating our future. Regret after a while is useless work that is worry masked by fear and something that may even hold you from the ultimate.
The God I believe in does not allow me to fear my past or let fear rule my future. I am an engineer of who I am and who I may become, but I am not the architect. I have been built and how fast and how well my life gets to the point where God takes my purpose from me and with any humble hope delivers it to the world.
Our truth is that we are not garbage, mistakes or afterthoughts. If a child keeps himself busy in the womb by learning the dimensions of his thumb in the second trimester of pregnancy and the mathematic improbability is to create you, just you. Not a copy, of someone else. Your ability to stand out and to help is a gift to everyone, and you. Again, Psalm 139. That is truth.
We are here to settle the score, to make things right and to make the planet better for as long as possible. The environment, our schools and the way we rear our children among so many needs on this broken planet matters to each of us and it matters to the Holy Father that created this universe to help all of realize our unique relationship with Jesus so we can push away the lies spoken over us and the pain inflicted upon everyone whom takes ownership of having experienced life.
My change, my ability to know who I was and am isn’t based upon brokenness, it is based on the living word that is written across my heart as I continue to know and grow in my Savior, Jesus Christ.