Life has choices, God was sure of this. Ask yourself: is it easier to be obedient to a loving father, or is it easier to live in recidivism, because living in what what we know is just easier, painful as it may be. Shame is so easy, when it’s so easy to acquire these days.
We trade safety in the now, for the ability to represent the desired safety, comfort and affirmation we never had when it was so important, usually in our formative years. An ability to stand for what the unique person has to offer the world is compromised because we don’t trust our gut, feelings and actual emotions that tell us if we are in a safe situation, or if we can finally be the people we’re meant to be.
God never wanted us to live in fear that he was going to be a punisher. Fear of our Lord, means earned respect. God has earned respect if you see the creation of all around and within ourselves.
Our earthly father may have been a person we may have feared physically and emotionally. Having possibly not learned to trust and rely on fear and shame. These are chemically driven, and more often than not, give way to addiction to an unhealthy lifestyle.
Choosing to learn and know that everything we need is within us when learning to trust.
Being designed to grow stronger day by day, there is no preassigned narrative to our individual story, and while that can work to our advantage and also disadvantage, ultimately the choice can be to subscribe to the narrative of learned emotions based on fear and the past inability trust.
Influences, good or bad, help to grow into the person we haven’t seen yet.
We may seek constant shame and guilt that was given to us by those who came before us. The other option is pull the layers of the onion back, and start the process of learning who we are through journaling or other means, and examining why we make the choices we make.
It’s wise to step back and question anyone or anything who might attempt to hardwire our ability to become addicted to emotions that disengage from who, what, where, when or how that helps us to be a part of who we are meant to be.
Falling for the lies that we tell ourselves that “this time it will be different,” and “this helps me control my life,” or “these are the only people who I could ever trust” are common themes of self betrayal. Repeating learned behaviors usually ends in pain because expecting different results and not getting them, leaves us where we started: feeling empty and alone.
There is no such thing as control. Control is a mirage designed to allow us to think there is an antidote in the form of an external source, which is the foundation of building addictions.
Codependence leads to lifelong suffering by losing your identity and not finding your true purpose.
Addiction to substance is a conduit or other things, and none of them are safe or smart, but the results are emotions which give a familiarity of the knowledge of being too young to either defend our ground or to know something as abstract as truth. How is there truth, when there isn’t a reality that is even in the neighborhood of perception?
That is the uneasy feeling of wanting what we cannot have, because we cannot reclaim what was never given. The comfort of not just feeling that love, but living in that love and that nothing can substitute that space.
When we examine the motives behind our actions, the more we begin to see how these actions are learning to be heard, understood and to receive validation.
We are designed for us to repeat what we know and have learned, and seeing reoccurring themes helps to know which lies we tell ourselves in order to make sense of this difficult world. It’s a whole lot more difficult though when dealing with compounding issues. Less is more, more then than not.
Repeating the mistakes of earthly parents, or those who had the most influence, by way of force, leads us to continue to do anything to be heard.
Being afraid is not the best way to learn and certainly not the best option to thrive. When living for survival, trust is irrelevant because it’s possible to do anything not have the pain happen again. Like trying to love someone who cannot love. Unfortunately and often it is all we know, so we may even run to an negative situation or person, usually a parent, hoping this time it will be different.
The truth is, for those who choose to learn about a God who loves us, and resides in our heart, and who will not let go, is a excellent way to start walking back to what a loving father is. Then, if we submit ourselves to a loving peace found in us, given to us by God, we can grow in our temple and soul, ultimately driven by rebirth.
It is when we step out on that faith based on small actions, is when God again provides bigger rewards of wisdom. The ability to take a chance on ourselves, when in the past, had we listened to the blame and shame game we would never trust in ourselves to reach for the brass ring to walk the walk of living with genuine character, as unique as that may be.
This gives us the strength to make us and ultimately the world around us a better place to be.
It’s helps to practice trusting our gut. It’s also helpful to to practice keeping promises to ourselves. Read the words that we write, and holding thoughts captive so to be responsible to our choices for making the correct decision and learning to trust.
Not learning to trust thoughts, actions, then we will be physically and emotionally tired without the will to trust that healing is there when taking the first steps of faith to begin healing. Practicing, and being good to ourselves is vitally important, as well as rewards for making positive steps.
Peace isn’t always what we choose to do, but often it’s what we choose not to do. Understanding the reasons behind not choosing self-betrayal is paramount to building boundaries and knowing which external items will leave emptiness and loneliness.
Often when we know true boundaries we can learn value the wisdom that we cannot control anything. When we ascend the mountain of knowledge of understanding a bit about ourselves, and the wisdom of knowing of who we are is a gift so beautiful, that we are made to be only you and I, and that is enough.